Tuesday, February 3, 2009

Cherry Picking President Obama's First 14 Days*

Photo: Matt Bites


Signed Executive Order directing the closure of Gitmo in one year without the benefit of any ind of plan about what to do with the assholes stored there
Signed Executive Order closing CIA detention facilities overseas, by definition crippling intelligence efforts
Signed Executive Order imposing Army Field Manual interrogation requirements on all US security personnel targeting terrorists overseas, by definition crippling intelligence afforts
Signed Executive Order allowing Obama administration to release secret documents from previous administrations, allowing for the selective use of politically sensitive information and politicization of intelligence information
Signed Executive Order limiting participation of lobbyists in the executive Branch, with the exception of whomever President Obama wants to pick in violation of his own EO

Signed Memorandum mandating increasing fuel economy at a time when American automobile manufacturers are at or near bankruptcy
Signed Memorandum granting states the right to set their own emissions standards, thus leading to the creation of multiple emissions standards and thus driving up the cost of producing automobiles at a time when American automobile manufacturers are at or near bankruptcy
Signed Memorandum lifting restrictions on use of federal funds by NGOs to perform abortions overseas

Made many speeches of raising the ethics bar in Washington and then proceeded to as follows:

Nominated tax cheat Tim Geithner for Treasury (confirmed and sworn)
Nominated tax cheat Tom Daschle for HHS (withdrawn)
Nominated tax cheat Nancy Kellefer for Chief Performance Officer (withdrawn)
Nominated scandal ridden Bill Richardson for Commerce Secretary (withdrawn)
Nominated perjurer and pardons-for-terrorists supporter Eric Holder for Attorney General (confirmed and sworn)
Nominated serial corruption target, junior Senator and international affairs neophyte Hillary Clinton for Secretary of State (confirmed and sworn)
Nominated hider-of-her-fiduciary relationship with a major pro-labor group Rep. Hilda Solis as Secretary of Labor

Has championed a “stimulus bill” full of statutes supporting pent up Democrat special interest giveaways, increased government meddling, and which will add over $300 billion going forward to the annual baseline federal budget.

Gave first official interview as President to Arabic network, during which he apologized for all US actions to date in the Muslim world; hearkened back to the good old days when Saddam Hussein was in power, mullahs were invading US embassies, and terrorists were bombing US facilities with abandon

Has been told by Iran that talk is cheap and useless until the United States changes everything about itself

In the spirit of bipartisanship, told a room of Republicans disputing provisions of the stimulus bill, “I won.”
* SBD understands that it has been 15 days since the Ascendance, er Inauguration, of the the Chairman, er President, but nothing happens on Day 1, so SBD is spotting President Obama a whole day.