Tuesday, December 23, 2008

1600 Pennsylvania Ave

Although the focus remains on President-select Obama's man boobs on full display in Hawaii and his stunningly cool reactions, graceful obfuscations, and serene investigations into those unfortunate distractions involving that man with the absurd head of hair, efforts continue apace in Washington, D.C., to prepare the city for the Inauguration and associated parades.

After Obama is sworn in, he will embark on a parade down Pennsylvania Ave to the Lafayette Park plaza just north of the White House, which has served as the national protest park for years. On any given day, you can enjoy the sights and sounds of democracy in full bounce and swing.

In any event, workers are putting together viewing stands to house the new President and his most special guests and dignitaries, where they will sit for the parade of fools and American Idol wannabees.

There are two main stands, one opposite the other. This picture shows the stand being built just for Oprah and her entourage. Notice the Big "O". Also, notice the steel framing, designed to take into consideration her recent announcement that she weighs "200 pounds."

The stand pictured below will serve to house the President. The structure will be left "as is" in order to symbolize the current economic depression.

The stand is designed to resemble new affordable housing abandoned by a developer owned by hedge funds that put all their money under the care of Bernie Madoff. Once Obama has taken his seat in the structure and as the parade proceeds, union workers, community activists, Al Gore, and pre-schoolers who have been thrown out of their day care facilities by Sarah Palin, will descend on the structure and build around Obama a sustainably green apartment complex, outfitted with solar panels, composting toilets, free WiFi, a 24-hour abortion clinic, and Ikea furniture. The structure will serve as permanent housing for the legion of protesters, hippies, drunks, righteous clergy and graduate students who on any given day have been occupying Lafayette Park banging on drums and throwing shoes over the White House fence in perpetual protest of George Bush and the United States. Although under the Obama administration there will be nothing to protest, professional protesters will now have a facility where they can "work" and live, shacking up together in comfort and preparing a new generation of Brights and socially conscious, ever ready to crowd into Lafayette Park with their drums and rattles should The Man take control of things.