Sydney Brillo Duodenum likes to keep up with what's going on in other parts of the world. He seems to recall receiving an MA degree attesting to some general expertise as to things foreign.
Today, he takes a look at the state of the countries and localities that comprise, or once did, the British Empire.
England: The Royal Mail is seeking an infusion of private capital. Not to modernize or anything, but principally to get someone to cover its multi-billion pound pension liabilities. Like the United States, unfunded, underfunded, bankrupted, etc. pension funds will be what delivers us all to Hades.
Canada: At a time when Prime Minister Stephen Harper is being excoriated for not being Barack Obama, public sector workers in Canada are feeling very optimistic about their situation, so much so they are suspending their public interest duties until they get an even better deal than the one they have.
The United States: The Nanny State enlarges as New Regulations for Pool Drains Set to Take Effect.
Australia: The Rudd government has announced "the formation of the Australian Multicultural Advisory Council to advise it on promoting social cohesion and stemming racism. Its predecessor was allowed to lapse in 2006 and Australia has been without a multicultural policy since." This is in response to the horrific and shameful statement of former Prime Minister John Howard, who uttered this thought crime against humanity: "When you come to this country, you become Australian." It is now the policy of the Australia government to ensure that no one living in Australia be forced to be an Australian.
Zimbabwe: International war criminal Robert Mugabe is placing blame for the outbreak of cholera on a British conspiracy to drive him from office and sow discord in his kingdom of heaven on earth. The outbreak is the next logical step in Mugabe's attempt to turn his country into a giant concentration camp. South Africa, where one might gaze in hopes of seeing some moral leadership with respect to calling for Mugabe to quit or die, has only this to offer from its president Kgalema Molanthe: "The issue of whether President Mugabe should go or not was never been raised by the parties [discussing a political settlement within Zimbabwe]. So, it's really not for us - I mean, I don't know whether the British feel qualified to impose that on the people of Zimbabwe." Somebody needs to find the qualifications to assassinate Mugabe and his terror regime now.
Bermuda: According to the Royal Gazette, "Bermuda has once again topped the table of countries with the highest gross domestic product per capita, according to official figures released yesterday. The Island generated $5.85 billion of wealth in 2007, which works out at $91,477 per person." Wonder what that is now in the wake of the Bernie Madoff news.
Falkland Islands: No cause for alarm: "The Commander British Forces South Atlantic, Air Commodore Gordon Moulds, was quick to respond to suggestions in the British press that the Falkland Islands would be left undefended by the decision to divert the frigate HMS Northumberland [the only warship between the Islands and Argentina] to a European Union counter- piracy mission off the coast of East Africa." Really, it's not like troublemakers like Putin are throwing their support behind Argentina's claim on the Islands. Oh, wait.
Ireland: Striking a blow for civilization, Ireland has prevailed over European barbarians seeking to vanquish the most important of Old World measures: the pint. "The nation's drinkers breathed a sigh of relief this morning after news emerged from the European Parliament that Ireland can keep pouring pints indefinitely. The parliament officially adopted a proposal this morning which enables Ireland and the UK to continue to use both metric and other measurements such as pounds and ounces if desired. The ruling covers pints of milk and beer and cider on draught and also approves the use of miles for speed indications, road distances and signs in the UK." Constant vigilance, gentlemen, constant vigilance.
St. Helena: A report from Governor Andrew Gurr states that, "There were only three substantive items on today’s agenda and all of them were open to the public although none were in attendance." St. Helena's population is less than 4,500. The first item on the agenda is that eligible Saints, as they are called on that island, are not registering to vote. The Governor laments, "As this is the very foundation of our democracy I cannot think of any good reason for denying oneself a vote, but I respect the freedom that we all have here to make such decisions for ourselves." Another agenda item has to do with the Immigration Control Ordinance which forbids immigrants from purchasing scarce island land without a license from the government. The Governor opines that "it seems to me that provides a very good reason for making sure that the names of all Saints eligible to vote are on the Register of Electors." In Australia, this man would be in jail.
British Antarctic Territory: Still a merciless, alien wasteland.