Tuesday, March 3, 2009

I Been Deputized!

Sydney Brillo Duodenum has been deputized by President Obama.

I'm also deputizing every single American to visit a new website called recovery.gov so you can see where your tax dollars are going and hold us accountable for results.
Interesting. It's the height of Big Brotherism and Fascism to ask "citizens" to call the FBI or DHS if they think their neighbor Ahmed's little project involving 2000 pounds of fertilizer for his 400 square foot lawn doesn't seem right, but it is now a duty - we've been deputized, afterall - to call foul on some faceless bureaucrat residing in a Brutalism building in Washington.
And who's the Sheriff?
To you, he's Mr. Vice President, but around the White House, we call him the Sheriff -- (laughter) -- because if you're misusing taxpayer money, you'll have to answer to him.
People misusing tax payers dollars will have to answer to a man who spent 36 years in the Senate?

The President also said this, and it is a true representation of the size of his giant, brass balls:

Now, we have another responsibility. Having inherited a trillion-dollar deficit that we're working to cut in half, we also need to ensure that tax dollars aren't wasted on projects that don't deliver results.
That would be very interesting and laudable if not for the fact that President Obama forgets the little matter of the trillions of dollars he himself will be adding to the deficit. So apparently, when Deputy SBD calls to complain about the waste of tax payer dollars, he's only referring to all the taxes collected to support George Bush's government programs - the ones Obama will cut in half, like prescription drugs for seniors and huge federal outlays for public schools and subsidies for farms.